Simple cricketing hypothesis

Hmmm...

Race - a metareview

After a long hiatus, the combination of a good night about town with the utter joblessness that one feels while waiting around for a diploma pushed me into attending one of the "New Release!!" Hindi movie screenings that happen on campus.

This movie, as the observant amongst you readers will have noticed, was (surprise!) Race.

Usually, after watching a movie, a good friend and I scrounge through its IMDB and Wikipedia entries to see if we can dig up nuggets about said movie. And if it happens to be a very new one, we look up the reviews online, to see if it conforms with our opinion of the movie.

Our opinion of this movie: BLARGH!

One of the crappiest Hindi movies to have ever seen the light of day, it is rendered worse by the fact that so many otherwise decent actors agreed to work in this craptacular waste of time. Even our joblessness felt cheated!

HOWEVER!

What totally, completely, utterly rocked our sensibilities (even beyond the McKinsey Life Insurance shown in the film!) was the existence of a shocking number of positive reviews this movie was receiving! So I decided to pick through six random reviews, just to bring to light the awesomeness in the perception gaps between different people.

1. 'Race' - An okay entertainer

Starts off well by saying subtlety and restraint aren't exactly the hallmarks of Abbas-Mustaan (how the heck do you spell that second guy's name?!), but then actually lauds Akshaye Khanna on his performance! To be fair though, he wasn't bad, but certainly not praiseworthy. Acting cannot be graded relatively!
They do mention that Sameera Reddy sounds dumb quite convincingly. What they fail to mention is their opinion on whether this is by design or not :-D

2. “RACE” - One of the 10 Best Thrillers

The most shocking review of them all! Its title alone makes one cringe. The entire body of the review is so stuffed with hyperbole, one is actually left wondering if it isn't really poking fun at the movie. The one thing they do get right is a square-peg-in-round-hole reference to Sameera Reddy.

3. Indiainfo Movie Reviews

Another review calling this movie a sure-fire "Best" for 2008 - with the 3rd month in the year not over yet! Worse yet, it goes on to heap praise on the writing and (urk!) the dialogues! The dialogues, incidentally, was unanimously voted as the corniest, most predictable tripe to ever be dished out on-screen, after our screening.

4. Economic Times Review

Finally, sanity prevails! Finally, a review that gives this movie its rightful place in Bollyworld! Finally, somebody gathers up the cojones to look past "dumb", and call Sameera Reddy (in the movie) silly, naive, stupid and irritating!
Only one gripe though: it pans the movie in totality, and then labels it 'not bad'. BZZZT!! Wrong!

5. Rediff: Too many twists spoil this Race

My most favourite review of the lot. Praises Kapoor's "Sanjay Dutt-Musafir" knock-off look, but captures the movie best in two words: vague mess.
Says it isn't objectionably bad, but that's okay, there's not much that needs objecting to.

6. My own review

This one's simple and short: what is wrong with this movie?

Answer:

Not bad? Bah. Avoid at all costs!

The life

No obligations.
Sitting under a tree.
Ass on grass.
A cup of tea.
A good book.
A sporadic hearty laugh.
A light breeze.
The occasional drop of rain.
Passers-by giving longing glances.
And of course, good company.

This, my friends, is the life.

Sign-out offer!

An Index Expurgatorius

(Found here, en route to scrambling to a submission on Managerial Ethics, which has previously also been proved productive..)

The man who marks or leaves with pages bent
The volume that some trusting friend has lent,
Or keeps it over long, or scruples not
To let its due returning be forgot;
The man who guards his books with miser's care,
And does not joy to lend them, and to share;
The man whose shelves are dust begrimed and few,
Who reads when he has nothing else to do;
The man who raves of classic writers, but
Is found to keep them with their leaves uncut;
The man who looks on literature as news,
And gets his culture from the book reviews;
Who loves not fair, clean type, and margins wide --
Or loves these better than the thought inside;
Who buys his books to decorate the shelf,
Or gives a book he has not read himself;
Who reads from priggish motives, or for looks,
Or any reason save the love of books.
Great Lord, who judgest sins of all degrees,
Is there no little private hell for these?

Great ethical questions

1. Who let the dogs out?
2. Who shot the sherriff?
3. Who framed Roger Rabbit?
4. Do the handicapped go to Hell?
5. Who flung dung?
6. Noodles or rice?
7. How much is that doggie in the window?
8. Where's Waldo?
9. Who are 'they'? What are 'they' saying?
10. To be or not to be, that is the great ethical question...
11. How you doin'?
12. Where's the party tonight?
13. Where is the ID Cod?
14. Are those real?
15. Are we there yet?

All formulated in an extremely productive Managerial Ethics class. Any more suggestions?

Back home!

After (a really hot!) summers, brief encounters with relatives and family friends, and a much vaunted traditonal annual encounter with the little/fat/smelly/funny/snarky/gabby/all-of-the-above one at the traditional point of encounter, I'm back where I belong. (What do you know - exactly a year since that post!) And out come the lists, in no particular order, of course..

The good:

• Double breakfasts in Cognizant
• Leh Berry
• Cup N' Saucer
• The Fruit Shop On Greams Road
• Eden
• Casa Piccola
• M.A.C
• Delta Peripherals
• ThinkPad Service
• Realizing true "comp-fundoo"-ness of oneself
• Murugan Idli Shop
• Decent pay :-)
• Non-PITA project colleague
• XLRI Alumni Meet 2007, Chennai Chapter

The bad:

• Randomly having to go hungry on occasions
• Internet access issues

The ugly:

• Chennai weather
• Data loss :-O

The freakin' brilliant:

• Alternate weekends
• Hutch-to-Hutch STD @ Re.1/minute
  

Back to the grind, for now, with the occasional dip into the Indian Maddox.

Continuing...

..the PJ-ness - even though mine is shamelessly ripped off-a Plastic.com - here goes,

Q: What should Lady Rushdie change her name to, if she ever became the President of the United Status?

A: Baberaham Lincoln.

Yes. You may die laughing shortly after you pay me for the privilege :-)

What are Western values?

Taken from this discussion:

Western values? like supporting dictatorships in Chile, central America countries, Greece, Pakistan etc?

Western values like allowing friend countries to invade and occupy foreign countries (Turkey over Cyprus) while doing the exact opposite thing with non-friend countries?

Western values like increasing the price of imported goods from Africa in order to protect domestic production?

Western values like economically supporting all the 'orange' revolutions in former soviet union countries in order to get the geopolitical advantage?

Western values like dismantling Yugoslavia because the southern part has the largest deposits of a rare metal which USA wants for replacing enhanced uranium in its weapons?

Western values like lying about WMDs in Iraq?

Western values like taking the culture of one country and arbitrarily assign it to another (yeap, I am talking about the so called country of 'Macedonia', one of the biggest thefts of cultural identity in history) ?

Western values like giving money under the table to enemies of Chaves so as that he is overthrown, even if he is legally elected?

Western values like illegally giving money to Israel under the table, as well as advanced technology that no other one has?

Western values like don't doing anything about Israel's 200 nuclear warheads, even when they openly admit it?

Western values like privatizing everything and leaving over 60 million americans in the mercy of god, without medical insurance and health care? and with private health care companies sucking everything out of their clients?

Western values like banks increasing their profits 500% each year while the average payment of an american employee has remained almost the same in the last 30 years?

Western values like stealing ancient artifacts from all around the globe and displaying them in your museums?

Western values like changing the borders of other countries (for example in the Balkans) so as you can divide and conquer, while in Africa there are thousands of slaughtered people every day in Sudan, yet you say 'it's not your problem'??? (as Angela Merkel told us a few days ago)...

Western values like not destroying the drug factories and plantations of south America, even if you have accurately mapped all the globe with your satellites?

Western values like not doing anything for the environment because it will hurt your wallet?

What western values are you talking about? all your values were invented somewhere else, and you might not know it, but almost all your habits and things you use daily come from other countries that you bash as 'non-western'. Your clothing habbits probably come from Europe. Your food from Europe and Latin America. Your language comes from Europe. Your political system comes from Europe. Your music comes from Africa. Your religion comes from Middle East. Your sports come from Europe and the Far East. The foundations of your technology come from West Germany, where almost all top scientists came to USA before and after WWII.

Get a grip on reality. The battle between USA and Russia is far from over, because Russia got the biggest natural energy resources, and USA is scared to death about Europe depending on Russia for its energy needs. That about sums it up, really.

B-schooler chest thumping

What the Supergirl witnessed was work embedding itself into life. What is witnessed here is too many marketing case studies embedding itself into life..


To be fair, I think most B-schoolers would be guilty of this :-)